Indestructible Desire Page 3

  “Oh my God, I know. I am dreading when I finally feel up to going back to kick boxing classes. I am going to be so out of shape. I think as soon as I’m off these God forsaken meds I’ll fatten up quick.” I let out a small laugh. “Kayden cooks enough for a damn army.” Laughing again, I hold my ribs trying not to hurt myself. This is the first time today I‘ve smiled, and not had to fake it.

  “I have to head to the airport. Brooklyn’s going to drive me. I’m going to miss your bony ass.” She says poking me playfully in the arm. “When you come to Los Angeles in two weeks, we will party it up. Put all this bullshit behind us!” Leaning forward Rebecca gives me a gentle hug and taking extra care not to hurt my bruised ribs.

  “Text me when you land, okay?” My voice cracking as I try to hold back my tears. With everything that’s happened I’ve become a big emotional mess, one minute happy and fine, then the next a blubbering mess crying my eyes out.

  “Stop with the sad face, Savannah Elizabeth! You will make me cry and then I’ll have to go through the airport with raccoon eyes.” We both laugh together this time. Smiling through my tears, I give her one more hug and we say our goodbyes.

  Brooklyn packed a bag for me and herself so she can stay here these next few days. She’s flying back to Vancouver Monday to wrap up taping of the movie she’s been a stunt double in. It will be nice to have her here with me more then just a few days. She’ll probably still fly to L.A. off and on for casting calls and auditions. I’ll be flying in weekly again when I return to work in two weeks, so at least for a little while I can just relax and relish being able to be lazy before I dive back into my workaholic ways.

  It’s going to be nice having her here with me at Kayden’s house all weekend. I don’t want Kayden to feel obligated to hang around me every second of the day. He has a life and friends he likes to do things with on the weekends. Since they are his only days he isn’t working from sunrise to sunset, the last thing I want is for him to shut everyone out to be with me.

  ***

  There are no words to describe how amazing it feels to lay in a real bed. Not just any bed, but Kayden’s bed. He has the world’s most comfortable beds here, at his penthouse, and beach house. I don’t think I could last another night sleeping on the plastic mattress at the hospital, if you can even call it a mattress.

  Brooklyn is staying in the guest room down the hall from Kayden’s master bedroom. I saw her dragging Jax into her room when we all made our way upstairs. Trying to keep up with Brooklyn’s love life is physically impossible.

  My body is still sore, so Kayden had to lift me and place me into bed. He found it amusing, and even took advantage of the moment, copping a feel while doing so. I just laughed and nibbled at his neck, making a loud moan of pleasure escape his lips. It’s been over a week since I’ve been with Kayden. We’ve gotten used to fucking whenever the feeling arose, but since my accident I’ve been on strict orders to rest and not exert myself. It’s literally torture!

  “Here, baby.” Sitting down beside me, Kayden hands me my sleeping pills. I hate that I need to take these to sleep. I just want my life to go back to normal, but my mind is not allowing that to happen. I hope seeing a psychiatrist will help.

  Pinching the pills between my fingers I take them from Kayden, quickly dispensing them into my mouth. I lay and admire the way Kayden’s muscles flex as he twists the cap off my water for me. He has the sexiest body I’ve ever seen on a man. Crazy to think that he’s mine; I pinch myself daily to make sure I’m not, in fact, dreaming.

  Setting my water bottle on the night stand, Kayden makes his way around the bed. I bite on my bottom lip admiring his fine ass as he walks. Turning, Kayden looks at me with hooded eyes and an impish grin. “Are you ogling my ass, my sweet Savannah?”

  I laugh. “You caught me!”

  The light from the night sky shining in our bedroom is glimmering over his chiseled body. Making the ache between my legs increase. Shaking his head, he slowly crawls onto the bed, lying down beside me. “All I am to you is a piece of meat, but darlin’, that’s alright by me.” The fire in Kayden’s eyes is so hot; I swear its making me melt into the bed.

  I can’t stop smiling at him. I’m so grateful to be laying here with him right now. His magic fingers trail lightly along my arm stopping at my neck. Cupping the back of my neck, he leans down, giving me a soft delicious kiss, instantly blanketing my body in goose bumps. It feels like a million tiny fingers tickling me as every inch of me tingles from head to toe.

  “Mmm your lips taste so sweet.” Kayden says against my lips. Pulling away from my mouth, he leaves me breathless and hungry for more. With our faces only centimeters apart, he runs his tongue along my bottom lip, taking me by surprise when he bites down on it, clamping it firmly between his teeth.

  “Mmhmmm” I moan into his mouth. I feel my womb tighten with excitement. I’ve craved his touch for so many days. I swear I am about to explode just from his kiss.

  Giving me one more kiss, Kayden pulls away, smiling down lovingly at me. His green eyes look darker, almost an emerald green in our dark room. The only light is the reflection of the moon shining in our window.

  “I’ve missed your kisses…touching your lips…your breasts…and your sweet delicious pussy.” Kayden’s voice is like velvet rolling over my skin. I can feel the rumble against my arm through his chest as he talks, trailing a hot path over my body as his hands touch every inch of me.

  “I’ve missed every single inch of you too, baby. I feel like just one touch and I will go over the edge.” I let out a heavy sigh. I’m beyond frustrated with everything that’s happened. “I cannot wait to feel better; once I do, we have a lot of days to make up for. So you best be prepared cowboy, because this girl right here plans on riding you. All. Day. Long.” I say while kissing and sucking Kayden's shoulder, working my way up to his ear.

  He is like putty in my hands as soon as I start teasing his body. I run my tongue along his neck. Biting down on his earlobe, I gently tug on it. Enjoying the soft moans of pleasure escaping Kayden’ slips, “You are driving me to the brink of insanity.” He growls between clenched teeth as I slide my hand under the waist band of his briefs.

  Cupping his balls in my hand I massage them gently, instantly turned on feeling his excitement growing inside of his boxers. I gladly welcome Kayden’s eager lips as he kisses me passionately. Gripping his arm possessively, I quiver from his touch. I crave his touch to help me feel alive. Within seconds, Kayden’s fingers are sliding under the silk babydoll teddy I’m wearing.

  Between the sensations of his tongue caressing against mine, and the excitement of knowing I affect him so easily, I am coming undone just by him gently but firmly massaging my clit. Gripping his cock, I stroke it hard, following his length from root to tip.

  Moving slowly and sensually, taking extra care not to hurt my battered and bruised body, Kayden slides his fingers in and out me. “God baby, your pussy feels amazing. I’m dying to slide my cock into you and fuck you until we both crash from exhaustion.”

  I'm panting heavily as I try to regain my composure from the orgasm that instantly washes over me. I smile at Kayden, stroking him and stopping momentarily to rub circles on the head of his dick. Taking full advantage of the pre-cum that’s seeped out, “You feel like being naughty, Mr. Knox?”

  Kayden lets out a deep husky chuckle making my entire body tingle. I love the sound of his laugh. Over these last few days, he’s looked so sad and broken so seeing him relax and actually laughing is amazing. “What do you have in mind baby?”

  Removing my hand from his briefs I slowly and seductively suck the pre-cum from my thumb. Biting down on it momentarily, loving how it’s making Kayden squirm. I remove it from my mouth with a loud pop. “Well I was thinking, what is the harm of breaking the rules if you go nice and slow? I really want your cock buried to the brim inside of me…like now."

  Within seconds Kayden’s boxers are flying across the room. I can’t help but laugh, he is
like a kid in a candy store right now. “If it hurts at all you tell me, okay?” Leaning down, taking my chin into his hand, he looks into my eyes and it feels as if he’s peering straight into my soul.

  All I can do is shake my head. I take in a deep breath, sliding my fingers around Kayden’s torso. I spread my legs, bending them slightly to give Kayden enough room to slide in between my thighs. Lacing his fingers through my hair he rests on his elbows, lying one on each side of me. With slow delicious movements, Kayden slides all the way into me, filling me completely. Moans of pleasure pour out of my mouth.

  I’ve felt empty and detached from Kayden not being able to connect with him intimately. Every so often he pauses momentarily to see how I’m doing. I love how gentle and loving he is with me. Others see him as this big tough rugged man, but I get to see the man deep inside of him that no one else knows. The one that’s romantic, sexy, and who’s so tender and affectionate with me.

  Within a few minutes we are both climaxing together. It’s different this time. Usually we are so engulfed in ecstasy that we’re chasing our orgasm at a fast pace. This time because of my injuries, Kayden moves in and out of me at a slow pace, pumping into me as I climax around him. Digging my nails into his lower back, holding onto him tightly, I scream out his name.

  Thrusting his hips into me one last time, he rests his forehead against mine, panting in sync with me as we try to come down from an intense orgasm. Leaning up on his forearms, Kayden gazes down into my eyes; the love I feel for him when he looks at me like this is overwhelming. I don’t even realize I’m crying until I feel a tear pool inside of my ear. Rolling off of me, Kayden lays on his side looking me over. “I didn’t hurt you did I?” He asks in a low whisper. I can hear the sadness in his voice and see it on his face.

  Shaking my head, I swipe away my tears. I whisper, “No.”

  “Why are you crying, baby?”

  “I’m just overwhelmed with so many emotions. I thought I would never get to be like this with you ever again. I thought I was going to die, Kayden. The thought of never being with you ever again…it shredded me.”

  Kayden didn’t have to say a word. He knew I was emotionally fragile right now. All I needed was his love and protection. In his arms is where I feel the safest, as if no one can ever hurt me again. Kissing my temple, he covers us with the blanket and lies down beside me.

  My sleeping pills are starting to kick in, and my eye lids are feeling heavier with every passing minute. After checking the security camera on his tablet quickly, Kayden assures me that we’re safe. I’m finally able to close my eyes and drift off to sleep.

  ***

  Chapter Three

  ***

  I was able to get a good four hours of sleep in before I was startled awake by a gut wrenching nightmare. I keep reliving the moment I pulled the trigger over and over again. Though in my dream, every time I shoot Jacob in the head, he sits back up and just stares at me with an icy cold gaze. Freezing me where I sit, unable to move, I scream with fear so loud my throat burns and then I awaken every time.

  If I manage to fall back to sleep after that dream, I keep having dreams about Zak; each time they are the same, but different. It’s hard to explain or even comprehend. He’s chasing me through the woods and no matter how fast I run, I just can’t get a safe distance away from him. A cottage appears and I think I’ve found a safe place. After I get to it I try and try to push the door shut and turn the lock. Zak is too fast, he’s at the door moments after I run in. He’s pushing the door open; I keep fighting against him trying to push it shut…but it won’t lock. Feeling defeated, I fall to the ground in a ball screaming for Kayden, but he never comes. I awaken every time just before Zak shoots me.

  It’s terrifying, and every time I wake up from one of my nightmares, I feel disoriented, like I can’t tell if what I dreamt was real or not. They seem real, and I awaken terrified for my life.

  Sitting up faster than I should have, I scream out in pain. Jolting up like that is not the smartest thing to do when your entire body aches. I am drenched in sweat; my satin nightgown is sticking to my torso. Panic rips through me when I realize Kayden isn’t in bed beside me.

  Slowly slipping off of the bed, I make my way to the bathroom. Using a warm damp wash cloth, I wipe my face. Stripping out of my babydoll, I toss it in the wicker hamper by the bathroom door. I rummage through the drawers finding a hair tie. I gently tie my hair back in a loose bun, taking extra care not to pull where my incision is still healing.

  Walking into Kayden’s closet, I find the spot he cleared for my clothing. I slowly slide on a pair of black Victoria Secret yoga pants and a hot pink tank top. Feeling better now that I’ve had time to come out of the fog I was stuck in from my nightmare, I make my way downstairs to try and find Kayden.

  The house is quiet and illuminated only by a few dim lights on throughout the house. I can hear the light hum of a television and spot Alec and Jerome, the new security guards, in the small sitting area off of the kitchen. Jerome is sleeping sprawled out on one of the small sofas, while Alec is watching TV and security monitors. It’s almost three a.m. They take turns every few hours monitoring the grounds. During the day, Jax monitors the house while they sleep in the morning.

  I feel safe between them three and Kayden. I am happy he suggested we come and stay here until Zak is caught, rather than back at one of our beach houses. I decide to say hello, the last thing I want is to catch an ex navy seal off guard.

  “Hey Alec, have you seen Kayden?” I ask leaning gingerly against the archway.

  Turning and flashing me a smile, I can’t help but smile back at him. Alec looks to be in his mid-fifties but has a body like a thirty year old. I imagine it's from maintaining a healthy life style. He is slender but muscular, standing around six feet tall. He has dark brown eyes that sit close together. His sharp nose and small thin mouth, paired with his silver buzz cut makes him appear standoffish. Definitely not someone you would approach willingly, but once he talks to you that all changes. He's charming and grew up in New Jersey; you can tell as soon as he opens his mouth.

  “Hello, Miss Livingston. Mr. Knox is in his sports room, I believe. I can check the monitors to be sure?”

  Giving him a small smile, I tell him no need and make my way towards Kayden’s sports room, otherwise known as his man cave. It's fully equipped with large flat screen televisions, big masculine leather sofas, a pool table, old school arcade games, and a mini bar. He and his guy friends are always in there watching a game or playing pool.

  He’s lying on the leather couch watching ESPN and as soon as I spot him, my stomach is over taken by what feels like a thousand tiny butterflies. I hope I never lose this feeling whenever my eyes fall on Kayden.

  I make my way over to the couch and see he’s awake, but his eyes seem a million miles away. He’s looking at the television but not really watching what’s on the screen. Sliding one leg under me, I sit down in front of him. Resting my hand on his bare chest, I take in the magnificent view that is Kayden Knox.

  His light brown hair is all tousled in every direction, making him appear rough and delicious. A two-day stubble on his face makes him appear rugged, nothing like the billionaire he is. He's lying on the couch wearing nothing but orange Nike basketball shorts. He looks beyond sexy without even trying.

  “Hey baby, I woke up and you weren’t in bed and I got worried.”

  Reaching for the remote, he flicks the T.V off and runs his fingers along my shoulder. It sends shivers down my spine, as his fingers tickle down my arm. His other hand holds my hip; I love the feeling of his hands on me. “Sorry, I couldn’t sleep. I tossed and turned forever…I didn’t want to disturb you. I know how hard it’s been for you to sleep.”

  I rest my palm against his prickly beard and smile down at him, looking him directly in the eyes. “Well that was sweet of you, but right now I need my man in bed with me.”

  “Okay, baby.” His Southern drawl rolling off his tongue makes my
entire body tingle. I could listen to him talk all night long and never grow tired of hearing it.

  Taking my hand into his, we make our way through the house. We say goodnight to Alec, and head up to our room. We can hear Brooklyn and Jax through her guestroom door. I just giggle and shake my head.

  Kayden, being the gentleman he is, effortlessly lifts me and places me back into bed. Within seconds, he’s laying down beside me, spooning against my back. Entwining our fingers, he hugs me against his body, making me feel safe and loved. I love the feeling of his stubble against my skin and his warm breath misting my neck.

  “Sweet dreams, baby, I love you.” He whispers into my ear, giving me a soft kiss on the neck.

  I squeeze his hands tighter, pulling them hard against my chest, a wordless way of telling him to hold me tightly. I can only hope that my nightmares are over for at least tonight. “I love you more.”

  ***

  I managed to sleep off and on the remainder of the night without any nightmares. I am so exhausted from not having a full night's sleep in over a week that I look like a zombie with dark circles around me eyes. I cannot wait until I can move around in bed and not be in constant pain. Hopefully talking with a professional will help with these nightmares.